Clean Humor & Jokes
back to main table of contents back to fidonews.orgFiftieth Wedding Anniversary
of
Tom Corey and Caroline
submitted by: wdbonner@pacbell.net
On their 50th wedding anniversary all went splendidly smooth. The food was fine, the wine was fine, the bellies were full and chatter gradually reduced from a boil to a simmer, even a few stretches and yawns. The caterer who prepared the celebration realized he needed to put some vitality back into the waning party quickly, and called on Tom to give his friends an account of the benefits of a marriage of such long duration. "Please tell us Tom, just what is it you have learned from all those wonderful fifty years with your wife Caroline?"
Tom slowly rises and responds, "Well, I've learned that marriage is the best teacher of all teachers in the world! It teaches you loyalty, meekness, forbearance, carefulness verbally, that is abstinence of vocalized calling on God to damn unexpected demons, a lot of self-restraint , forgiveness, and a great many other sharing qualities like with the TV remote control you wouldn't have ever needed... if you'd stayed single."
back to clean humor table of contents back to main table of contents back to fidonews.orgMONEY
From Anony mouse :)
It can buy a house, but not a home.
It can buy a bed, but not sleep.
It can buy a clock, but not time.
It can buy you a position, but not respect.
It can buy you medicine, but not health.
It can buy you blood, but not life.
It can buy you sex, but not love.
So you see, money isn't everything and it often causes pain and suffering.
I tell you this because I am your friend and as your friend I want to take away all of your pain.
So, send me all your money and I will suffer for you. :-))
Um.. Cash only Please :-)
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