Editorial

WDBonner@fidonews.org

Your editor has been following the P4 discussions and learning what many think on the subject. Some want to dump it, some want to ignore it, some want to `work around it', and believe it or not some want to work to modify it only in a couple of places to make it democratic in nature. I've taken the liberty to take excerpts of some messages in open echoes, to develop an understanding for the global reader that may not have access to these echoes.

With that foundation for this editoral in mind, and the knowledge that the Policy known as P4, being a bone of contention in many Regions since it was presented to replace Policy 1.0; plus (I am informed) was never ratified by the sysops as was Policy 1.0. That coupled with the necessity of all Zones to approve any ammendments has made it a catch 22 that is the quagmire, bone of contention, etc. that plagues Fidonet and perpetuates it's nick name,"Fight-O-net".

By: Dallas Hinton
To: Stewart Honsberger
Re: ZC Election Procedures

Hi Stewart -- on Nov 15 2000 at 22:24, you wrote:

SH> If nobody agrees to policy 4; why do people still agree to abide by SH> it?

It's called being honourable, Stewart. It's the same issue as obeying speed limits at 2 AM when you know there are no cops around. Either you live an ethical and honourable life or you don't.

Policy 4 is the policy that FidoNet uses. There is much of it I don't like, but until it's changed I will follow it. To do otherwise is to have anarchy, and while that was very enjoyable in the early days of FidoNet it rapidly became obvious that we couldn't continue in that pattern once we got beyond a few dozen members.

Cheers... Dallas

By: Steven Leeman
To: All
Re: American elections solved :-)
May also equate to PEEFOUR until modified and ratified-Ed. 8^)

Hello everybody.

NOTICE OF REVOCATION OF INDEPENDENCE

To the citizens of the United States of America, In the light of your failure to elect a President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective today. Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchial duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories. Except Utah, which she does not fancy. Your new prime minister (The rt. hon. Tony Blair, MP for the 97.85% of you who have until now been unaware that there is a world outside your borders) will appoint a minister for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire will be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed. To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

1. You should look up "revocation" in the Oxford English Dictionary. Then look up "aluminium". Check the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it. Generally, you should raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. Look up "vocabulary". Using the same twenty seven words interspersed with filler noises such as "like" and "you know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. Look up "interspersed".
2. There is no such thing as "US English". We will let Microsoft know on your behalf.
3. You should learn to distinguish the English and Australian accents. It really isn't that hard.
4. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as the good guys. Although it comes as a bit of a shock, the USA did not pilot the "Battle of Britain" spitfires during the war against Germany. Likewise, Rommel was defeated by the British & Australian Armies in Africa,.... not Sylvester Stallone & Bruce Willis. Probably your biggest shock will be the fact that the US didn't enter World War 2 until halfway through the war when the Germans mistakenly sank a few US ships. By then the war was decided by the Commonwealth countries troops ..... and your guys just helped to speed the end up.
5. You should relearn your original national anthem, "God Save The Queen", but only after fully carrying out task 1. We would not want you to get confused and give up half way through.
6. You should stop playing American "football". There is only one kind of football. What you refer to as American "football" is not a very good game. The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world outside your border may have noticed that no one else plays "American" football. You will no longer be allowed to play it, and should instead play proper football. Initially, it would be best if you played with the girls. It is a difficult game. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which is similar to American "football", but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like nancies). We are hoping to get together at least a US rugby sevens side by 2005.
7. You should declare war on Quebec and France, using nuclear weapons if they give you any merde. The 98.85% of you who were not aware that there is a world outside your borders should count yourselves lucky. The Russians have never been the bad guys. "Merde" is French for "sh*t".
8. July 4th is no longer a public holiday. November 8th will be a new national holiday, but only in England. It will be called "Indecisive Day".
9. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and it is for your own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what we mean.
10. Please tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us crazy. Thank you for your cooperation.

o Steven Leeman
Thanks for the funny Steven.