Net Humor
back to main table of contents back to fidonews.orgHUMOR selected by Ol'WDB
Jesus and Moses were playing golf one day on Earth. The course they were on had a particularly difficult hole, and Moses expressed his doubts that Jesus could make the shot over the water.
"Ah no, Moses, I think I can do it," explained Jesus. "I've seen Arnold Palmer make this shot, and if Arnold Palmer can do it, then so can I."
Moses rolled his eyes and let Jesus try. Sure enough, the ball splashed into the water. Moses parted the water for Jesus, who went in to retrieve his ball. Jesus, however, was not ready to give up.
"I know I can do this, Moses -- I've seen Arnold Palmer do it, and if he can do it, then so can I." True to form, however, Jesus' ball ended up back in the water. Moses parted the water, and Jesus went in to retrieve the ball.
"Look, Jesus," said Moses. "Try again if you like, but I'm not parting the water for you again."
"Fair enough, Moses," said Jesus. "But you know, I've seen Arnold Palmer make this shot, and if Arnold Palmer can do it, then so can I." Once again, Jesus' ball was in the water. Jesus proceeded to walk upon the water to get it.
Another group of golfers came up behind Moses and saw Jesus walking on the water.
"Holy Cow!" one of them said to Moses. "Who does that guy think he is, Jesus Christ?"
"No," said Moses, rolling his eyes. "He thinks he's Arnold Palmer."
back to humor table of contents back to main table of contents back to fidonews.orgClinton's Pigs
Thanks to Roy Reed
rcreedv@juno.com
As the President is getting off the helicopter in front of the White House,he has a baby pig under each arm.
The Marine guard snaps to attention, salutes, and says: "Nice pigs, sir."
The President replies: "These are not pigs, these are authentic Arkansas Razorback Hogs. I got one for Hillary, and I got one for Chelsea."
The Marine again snaps to attention, salutes, and replies, "Nice trade,sir."
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