Articles

R12 Election: the Runaround

Here's a story, sad but true
From Lesley-Dee through me to you
About an RC she once knew
And his tantrums when he was through

Chorus: Stay away from the Runaround, Mike

Lesley-Dee Dylan @1:250/201
as told to Doug Myers

This strange story is, in part, the result of your editor trying to get someone from Region 12 to post news on the election there. <Sigh> Everyone was busy trying to get routed netmail working, and most considered that exercise to have more intrinsic value than trying to keep a demanding Snooze editor silent.

However, Leslie-Dee did respond, though her responses got lost in routed netmail (okay, so maybe they had a point about priorities)! Earlier this week, Dee crashed me packets of the goings on in her regional echo where the election was being (kinda) conducted. Her effort was unsuccessful, though, in that I couldn't absorb the over 1 Meg of messages in time to write a comprehensive story. Just as we went to press it occurred to me, however, that Dee had summarized the latter part of the election in a post to me telling me why she couldn't write the story.

So the poem at the beginning is to represent the fact that this is not a conventional article... more like poetry in motion. And the "as told to..." in the credits is to represent the fact that I absolutely did not even ask Dee if I could post her netmail, let alone ascribe the story to her. You'd think I'd learn to stop taking liberties with the Chief Super-Bitch, but the rest of the story is in her words, though extracted from two different netmail messages and edited.

----

It begins with Shawn O'Connor posting a test message, responded to by Mike O'Connor, followed by Shawn O'Connor's announcement of the calling of the election. When Shawn is called on it, since he didn't have the authority to call an election, Mike O'Connor (then RC) came in and announced that he had been away on business and had to ask Shawn to make the post on his behalf. But he did have time to respond to the test post, just before Shawn posted the announcement, and it would have taken only a moment to say - Shawn will be posting the election information with my authority.

The message base continues on through a comedy of errors, and flames and attacks, through four ballots, until Mike declares Darrell Salter the winner, in a rather farcical debacle.

There are some real gems in there - look in particular for Steve Fredette's campaign poetry - a take off on HMS Pinafore.

Please make an effort to get something from this to put into the Snooze. I am finally starting to recover a bit from this flu, but I'm still pretty sick, and I have a lot of other stuff to catch up on. This provides a perfect example of spontaneous human combustion of an elflord RC. It's absolutely classic.

We were heading into yet another runoff, with an absolute tie between Darrell Salter and Steve Fredette, when Steve Fredette posted an hilarious message, from the alias of Mike O'Connor Jr.:

From: Mike O'Connor Jr. Oct-30-99 11:53:08
To: All Oct-30-99 15:16:34
Subj: Runoff election

Dad phoned me from the rest home earlier today and asked if I would take over the job of returning officer for the election. He's having a hip replaced and can't spare the time right now. Don't get into a panic now, folks. I don't have nearly as much trouble with counting as Uncle Shawn did.

The 923rd runoff begins on July 14, 2017 at 9:00pm and ends Friday, July 21, 2017 at 9:00pm.

Results to date:

Darrell Salter          27
Steve Fredette          27

17 votes invalidated due to sysops having passed away.

From: Mike O'Connor Nov-03-99 20:58:32
To: All Nov-04-99 11:14:56
Subj: My vote

Steve just screwed himself.

I withdraw my vote tallied under the password KillKenny.

It's truly a sad state of affairs when mail forgery is considered funny.

You are all pathetic.

Bye.

From: Mike O'Connor Nov-03-99 21:46:44
To: Darrell Salter Nov-04-99 11:14:56
Subj: Cheers

My condolences on your winning of the R12 election. A package is on it's way to your address.

You've got till Thursday Nov 11 to set things up with the ZC.

Cheers
Mike

From: Steve Fredette Nov-04-99 00:56:36
To: All Nov-04-99 11:14:20
Subj: Show of hands

All right people, how many of you actually thought my "Mike O'Connor Jr" post was funny?

[pausing to count show of hands]

Twelve. Ok, how many 'got' the joke, but thought it was juvenile, and not particularly amusing?

[counting]

Seventeen. (Hmmm... gotta try harder next time.) Ok, how many didn't get the joke at all, and actually believe that the real Mike O'Connor Jr (if there is one) actually teleported himself 18 years into the future, moved to Ottawa and posted a message from my system, and also doesn't know the difference between an alias and a forgery?

[counting]

One.

...Steve

From: Mike O'Connor Jr. Nov-04-99 01:12:48
To: Mike O'Connor Nov-04-99 11:14:20
Subj: My vote

MO> You are all pathetic.

Oh, fuck off, Dad. Grab a sense of humour. Drink your geritol and shut up. Or it's off to the pasture with you.

Oh, by the way... the Directeur General des Elections du Quebec called again asking about you & uncle Shawn. The polls indicate that the upcoming 17th sovereignty referendum will be very close, and they need your 'special skills' again this year.

...Your loving son

From: Steve Fredette Nov-04-99 11:42:50
To: All Nov-04-99 23:11:44
Subj: Show of hands

* Forwarded (from: STEVE) by Steve Fredette using timEd 1.10.
* Originally from Mike O'Connor (1:167/166) to Steve Fredette (1:163/551).
* Original dated: Thu Nov 04, 09:00
* Replying to a message originally in area REG12

SF> Twelve. Ok, how many 'got' the joke, but thought it
SF> was juvenile, and not particularly amusing?

Insulting a supporter is just plain stupid.

BTW. You used my real name. I have the same name as my DAD.

Fuckin idiot.

SF> [counting]
SF> real Mike O'Connor Jr (if there is one) actually

That's me you fucken moron.

Don't bother to reply. I've severed all links.

Mike

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So the result of our fourth ballot in the R12C election was 14 for Darrell Salter, and 14 for Steve Fredette, but at the last moment, Mike O'Connor withdrew his own vote for Steve, making it 13 for Steve, and declared Salter the winner.

I told you the Reg12 election would be worth covering. :-)