Net Humor

From: "Mike Riddle" <mriddle@monarch.papillion.ne.us>
To: "Baker, Christopher" <cbaker84@digital.net (Christopher Baker)>,
Date: Wed, 29 Jan 97 08:12:05 -0600
Reply-To: "Mike Riddle" <mriddle@monarch.papillion.ne.us>
Subject: Fwd: Microsoft spam: Fwd: A joke

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From: FA2930E
To: RedSilk103

1. Their #1 product would be "Microsoft Winders".
2. Instead of an hourglass icon you'd get an empty beer bottle.
3. Occasionally you'd bring up a window that was covered with a Hefty bag and some duct tape.
4. Dialog boxes would give you the choice of "Ahh-right", "Naw", or "Git" instead of "Yes", "No", or "Cancel"
5. Instead of "Ta-Da!", the opening sound would be Dueling Banjos
6. The "Recycle Bin" in Winders '95 would be an outhouse
7. Whenever you pulled up the Sound Player you'd hear a digitized drunk redneck yelling "Freebird!"
8. Instead of "Start Me Up", the Winders '95 theme song would be "Achey-Breaky Heart"
9. PowerPoint would be named "ParPawnt"
10. Microsoft's programming tools would be "Vishul Basic" and "Vishul C++"
11. Winders 95 logo would incorporate the Confederate Flag
12. Instead of "VP", Microsoft big shots would be called "Cuz"
13. Hardware could be repaired using parts from an old Trans Am
14. Four words: Daisy Duke Screen Saver
15. "Well, the first thing you know old Bill's a billionaire...."
16. Flight Simulator replaced by Tractor-Pull Simulator
17. Microsoft CEO: Billy-Bob (a.k.a "Bubba") Gates

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